This town              reeks of you,

You stick             to all my clothes,

All humid by                   our love;

You brine the             air by your

Salty tears,               the stench of how 

We were                so venomous,

Never really                   leaves this place;

This town             dreams of you,

In silver spoons              force fed all the lies,

Gentle hands                   but rough intentions,

Your tears washing             the inside of my thighs;

Rough cannot              be bruised,

Not as much skin                    To keep as much heart;

This town               has had enough of you,

Like heaven,               in all the wrong ways,

The pain,                  It demands to be felt;

My knees,              They shake,

My heart,                           It aches,

Both subjects              of our own distrust,

Burnt out flames             Should never reignite 

 Today I ate       out of griefs unforgiving hand

And I thanked him         for all the crumbs,

It tasted so much         like what I had for lunch

Everyday for a         few years now,

He wonders how         I haven't gotten sick of it yet;

I tell him it reminds me         of my Mothers cooking 

On a Sunday afternoon             Microwaved meals and 

Bruised knees over the counter;                  Fathers dirty dishes 

Climbing up the walls                   Smoking slims in his green bathroom;

Faux smiles and untied shoelaces                   Toothbrush in my backpack:

Grandmas leftovers on my lips                  Leaves a residue on your skin;

I try not to stain,                  Be like watercolor, rinse off in the rain

It's hard to pretend not to be             All the things you grew up 

Being;

And for you, I keep my phone off silent

My legs wide open

When you call, I answer

My clothes all over your floor

And for you I'll stay sober for a little while longer

Or drunk when you bend me over

And for you I'll ignore my mother

Hit me harder

Only pretty when I'm crying

Only present when I'm hurting

And for you I'll swallow your fingers like a prayer 

Hit me harder

For you I'll let you treat me like a filler

Only need me when your aching

Hit me harder

Only present when I'm hurting

Can't sleep until you tell me

Won't eat until you let me

Only drunk until you bend me, for you

Sleep while I ache,

What love is this

Tell me so I may avoid it

Don't know what it feels like coming home,

Close the door